completely unrelated to anything

Target affixed a logo carrying strap to my toilet paper when I checked out today. I suspect it's part of their "go green" efforts, as I've also noticed that they're selling the reusable bags at the register as well. I found it hilarious to be toting my TP out of the store like it was a kicky new purse, so I had to capture it for you, dear readers (presuming I have any).

compulsions

I woke up this morning thinking about cleaning.

If you know me, you know this is out of the ordinary for a few reasons:

-- I have a few anal retentive/perfectionist tendencies (that's putting it mildly), so if I can't do something perfectly, I often don't bother at all (see: past failed attempts to learn to play the bass, sewing, cake decorating, etc.).

-- I seem to be missing the domestic gene that a lot of people have. I would rather do most anything than clean the house. I'm also lousy at grocery shopping and making meals. My poor husband.

Anyway, not only did I think about cleaning today ... I actually cleaned. And not just a quick wipe of the countertops. We're talking that and more. I even shined the stainless steel sink with lemon oil and wiped down all the cabinets. Weird, yet oddly satisfying.

Could this be nesting, or is my month off work pre-baby causing me to be a little OCD?

The State of the Cervix Address

• BP: 112/74
• baby's HR: 154 (good, said nurse)
• urine: "looks great!" Not something you hear every day, is it?
• weight: yeeeeah, not telling. Let's just say that around Christmas the first digit of my weight went to a number never before seen, and it's just gone up since then.
• fundal height measurement: 38. This should roughly correspond to the number of weeks pregnant you are. I'm 38 weeks 6 days today, so that's just fine. They'd only worry if the number was significantly higher (excess amniotic fluid? ginormous offspring?) or lower (baby is too small?).
• And the magic number everyone has been waiting for: 2! Yes, that's right ... I'm still 2 cm dilated. If you don't know, I need to get to 10. But it's all good, because as of right now, the dresser for the baby's room is still sitting in the living room, clothes still need to be washed, we still need to go out for our last pre-baby dinner/movie ... she can stay where she is a while longer.
  

pregnant or elderly?

I have reflux, I have issues that are too TMI to discuss in a public forum (that's what I get for laughing at commercials for said remedies, I guess), and today my hips feel like they're either grinding in the sockets or about to pop out of them, leaving me in a jello-like heap on the floor.

I suddenly have a lot more sympathy for the elderly.

weekly update

My OB appointment went well. Baby is head down and "very low," according to the doctor.

Stats are as follows:

• BP: 112/76
• baby's HR: 161
• ye olde cervix: 2 cm dilated, 75% effaced

I'm measuring on target, and doc is estimating that she'll be average to a little over average weight at birth -- between 7-8 pounds. She claims, and oh how I'd like to hold her to this prediction, that once things start rolling, it should be a "piece of cake." Mmm-hmm. I've never heard anyone describe labor and delivery that way, except maybe my mother -- and we all know that moms are just angling for grandchildren. ;)

better late than never ...

My friend Kristen has been gently pestering me for a while now to start a baby book, blog, or anything to capture the details of my pregnancy before I forget everything. I figured there's no time like the present (or 37 weeks 5 days) to get started.

Obviously this will evolve past a pregnancy blog once the little one is here in a couple of weeks. Until then, feel free to browse the archives. I'm trying to backdate the posts I write so it will *almost* be like I've been writing all along.

People say the weirdest things to pregnant women.

By far, my favorite:

"I know what you been doin'! You been SCREWIN'!"
-- yelled loudly by an obese, semi-toothless man wearing overalls and walking with a cane, as he passed me at the grocery store

And then, some random others:

"NOTHING looks cute on a woman who's 9 months pregnant. NOTHING."
-- said by someone I'd just met at a party, who then looked at me, gaped for a moment, stuttered ... and then shockingly apologized.

"Are you sure there aren't twins in there?"
-- a friend's well-meaning mother

"You look too small for XX weeks ... are you eating/is the baby ok/are you seeing a doctor?"
-- too many people to count

"Pack up those cookie sheets. You don't need to be eating cookies. You're pregnant."
-- our realtor

Another popular version: "You're going to eat/drink THAT?"
-- coworkers, mostly

"She likes your milk."
-- our realtor again, explaining why a toddler I had just met liked me

"Oh, I had a stillborn baby at 40 weeks."
-- ultrasound technician (one would think people in this line of work would know not to say things like that to pregnant women!)

"Do you want that DECAF?"
-- Starbucks barista, after glancing at my belly

I've come to the conclusion that rather than using the Think, Then Speak method of communicating, most people operate under the Blurt Out Thoughtless Things, Then Go On Their Merry Way school of thought. Good times.